搞笑英語(yǔ)笑話

時(shí)間：2020-10-12 16:11:33 英語(yǔ)笑話我要投稿

搞笑英語(yǔ)笑話精選

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搞笑英語(yǔ)笑話精選

　　Three pastors in the south were having lunch in a diner. One said, You know, since summer started I’ve been having trouble with bats in my loft(閣樓) and attic at church. I’ve tried everything----noise, spray, cats----nothing seems to scare them away.

　　Another said, Yes, me too. I’ve got hundreds living in my belfry(鐘樓) and in the attic. I’ve been had the place fumigated(熏制) , and they still won’t go away.

　　The third said, I baptized(洗禮) all mine, and made them members of the church...haven’t seen one back since!

　　三個(gè)南部的牧師在一家小餐館里吃午飯。其中的一個(gè)說道：“你們知道嗎，自從夏天來臨，我的教堂的閣樓和頂樓就被蝙蝠騷擾，我用盡了一切辦法----噪音、噴霧、貓----似乎什么都不能把它們趕走。”

　　另外一位說：“是啊，我也是。在我的鐘樓和閣樓也有好幾百只。我曾經(jīng)請(qǐng)人把整個(gè)地方用煙熏消毒一遍，它們還是趕不走。”

　　第三個(gè)牧師說：“我為我那里的所有蝙蝠洗禮，讓它們成為教會(huì)的.一員......從此一只也沒有再回來過。”

　　It's His Fault

　　Billy and Bobby were small boys. They were brothers, and they often had fights with each other.

　　Last Saturday their mother said to them, I'm going to cook our lunch now. Go out and play in the garden and be good.

　　Yes, Mummy, the two boys answered, and they went out.

　　They played in the garden for half an hour, and then Billy ran into the kitchen. Mummy, he said, Bobby's broken a window in Mrs. Allen's house. Mrs. Allen was one of their neighbors.

　　He's a bad boy, his mother said. How did he break it?

　　I threw a stone at him, Billy answered, and he quickly moved down.

　　是他的錯(cuò)

　　比利和波比都是小男孩。他們是兄弟，兩人經(jīng)常打架。

　　上個(gè)星期六，他們的媽媽對(duì)他們說，我現(xiàn)在要做午飯了。去，到花園去玩吧，別淘氣。

　　是，媽媽，兩個(gè)男孩回答，然后他們就出去了。

　　他們?cè)诨▓@里玩了半個(gè)小時(shí)，然后比利跑進(jìn)了廚房。媽媽，他說，波比打碎了艾倫太太家的窗玻璃。艾倫太太是他們的鄰居。

　　他是個(gè)壞孩子，他的媽媽說，他是怎么把玻璃打碎的?

　　我朝他扔了一塊石子，比利回答道，他趕緊蹲下。

　　Once in a physics examination, Nick finished the first question very soon, while his classmates were thinking it hard.

　　The question was: When it thunders why do we see the lighting first, then hear the thunderrolls?

　　Nick's answer: Because our eyes are before ears.