笑料十足的英語笑話

笑料十足的英語笑話

　　笑話是一個漢語詞匯，意思是引人發(fā)笑的話或事情。笑話具有篇幅短小，故事情節(jié)簡單而巧妙，往往出人意料，給人突然之間笑神來了的奇妙感覺的特點。以下是小編幫大家整理的笑料十足的英語笑話，僅供參考，大家一起來看看吧。

　　笑料十足的英語笑話 1

　　The Mean Mans Party

　　The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to the fifth floor and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot."

　　"Why use my elbow and foot?"

　　"Well, gosh," was the reply, "Youre not coming empty-handed, are you?"

　　Older Goats in America美國老羊

　　A group of Americans were traveling by tour bus through Holland. As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goats milk was used.

　　She showed the group a lovely hillside where many goats were grazing. These, she explained, were the older goats put out to pasture when they no longer produced. She then asked, "What do you do with your older goats in America?"

　　A spry old gentleman answered, "They send us on bus tours!"

　　Driving a wreck

　　A guy was driving when a policeman pulled him over. He rolled down his window and said to the officer, "Is there a problem, Officer?""No problem at all. I just observed your safe driving and am pleased to award you a $5,000 Safe Driver Award. Congratulations. What do you think youre going to do with the money?"He thought for a minute and said, "Well, I guess Ill go get that drivers license."The lady sitting in the passenger seat said to the policeman, "Oh, dont pay attention to him - hes a smartass when hes drunk and stoned(醉酒的) ."The guy from the back seat said, "I TOLD you guys we wouldnt get far in a stolen car!"At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk(行李箱) and a muffled(聽不清的) voice said, "Are we over the border yet?"

　　笑料十足的英語笑話 2

　　笑話一：

　　The doctor to the patient: "I have bad news and worse news."

　　Patient: "Well, might as well give me the bad news first."

　　Doctor: "The lab called with your test results. They said you have 24 hours to live."

　　Patient: "24 HOURS! Thats terrible! What could be worse?"

　　Doctor: "Ive been trying to reach you since yesterday."

　　笑話二：

　　Whats the longest word in the English language?

　　Smiles. Because there is a mile between its first and last letters.

　　笑話三：

　　Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?"

　　Student: "Meat!"

　　Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?"

　　Student: "Bacon!"

　　Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?"

　　Student: "Homework!"

　　笑話四：

　　Why did the tomato turn red?

　　Because it saw the salad dressing!

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